I forgot to mention about vacation.
We went to a safari in GA
and it was absolutely amazing.
we got to feed zebras and other animals.
super cool.

Right now I'm sitting in the hospital
room with my dad
he goes for the gamma knife
on thursday which is
a surgery were they put
four screws into his skull
and pin point the cancer.
I hope it goes well.
My dad's swelling in his brain
has went down some
he can turn in the bed
and feed himself
but he had a stroke and most likely
wont be able to walk again

everything is super stressful
at the moment
hoping it gets a little better

ive pretty much stopped talking
to a few close friends
after finding out that
i cant trust them
or for the simple fact
that we just don't make effort
to hang out anymore
i kinda feel like
im growing apart
from everyone of my friends.

everyone's crazy. it's just about how you deal with it.

 the rain hasn't attacked me yet. good thing though because i'd hate to get hit in the head with hail.

 my legs asleep>.<

.

If only I could close my eyes
and everything get better
I feel like my world
has been flipped upside down

my dad is getting a lot worse
they found four tumors in his brain
and two in his spine on top of
the ones we already knew about
then said there's not
much they can do
dad still wants to fight
but we wont know
if he can until monday
this seems like forever

We've been preparing
for him to come home
building a ramp, widening doors,
stuff out, and cleaning
I even took a dog,cat, and kitten
to the humane society
and I cried.

Here I am at 4:52am
trying to clear my head
as everything sinks in
telling myself not to worry
that everything will fall into place
but life just doesn't seem
that way anymore.